The Power of Validation in a Culture of Invalidation

I recently watched the video above titled Validation. It is a wonderful "feel good" story of how just validating someone has a positive impact on their feelings and attitude. I would encourage you to watch it. As I write this first blog, I can only think about the millions of men, women and couples who have experienced abortion related trauma but have yet had the experience of being validated for the impact it may have on them personally and as a couple. 

We live in a society that invalidates the pain of abortion related trauma that many feel for various reasons. The reasons may include: gender conditioning, social and cultural conditioning, politics, arguments between pro life or pro choice, trauma between the genders, feminism etc. These are only a few. I also know that many of these people deserve to be validated if they have experienced trauma and /or PTSD, and they also have a right to receive the highest level of professional mental health services, just like with any trauma such as the trauma of sexual abuse, war etc. 

It is almost the new year, and I am excited about the birth of this new organization. I am also exited that finally, we are able to look at research and develop evidenced based models of treatment that are based on sound psychological theory in treating those with abortion related trauma. Since 1973, the treatment of abortion related trauma has been left out of the mental health field for some of the reasons mentioned above. Unfortunately, there have been millions since then, that could have been properly assessed and received appropriate evidenced based treatment, that didn't. The start of a new year reminds us of new beginnings and goals. I am excited that 2015 brings with it new beginnings. I can only imagine what the millions of those that have been impacted by abortion related trauma would feel if they were told what they are feeling is valid despite a culture of trauma that is well defined by defense mechanisms such as denial and rationalization etc. 

R.D. Lang said this, "When we invalidate people or deny their perceptions and personal experiences, we make mental invalids of them." The validation of abortion being a potential trauma for men, women and couples could be the first step that is needed toward mental and emotional healing. In the end, breaking through both cultural and personal defense mechanisms may bring the hope that is needed to find recovery from the externalized symptoms they may have developed. These might include, addictions of many kinds, anger, depression anxiety etc. Those of us that work in the mental health field know, when people are invalidated and repress their trauma, it later comes out in externalized symptoms. Unfortunately these externalized symptoms often cause more trauma for those they interact with. As a result, the cycle of trauma just continues and often between the genders. We only have to look at culture to see this. 

Join me in taking the first step to validate those men, women and couples who may have experienced abortion related trauma and come into your office on a daily basis. The very simple thing of including it as a reproductive loss on an intake form might be your first step as a therapist in the validation process with your clients. 

It is my hope that in 2015, like the video above, we can be an organization of change. Happy New Year!